This week, comedian David Walliams was named as the celebrity at the centre of numerous sexual misconduct allegations.
A joint investigation by The Guardian and the news broadcaster ITN included allegations from numerous women claiming that Walliams “groomed” them as a teenagers, with one in particular accusing him of “sexual assault”.
The former Britain’s Got Talent judge has denied all of the allegations against him.
In a statement, Walliams said: “I am not a sexual predator… I have not broken the law… I am devastated that some of the women I met 10 to 20 years ago have now expressed hurt or anger towards me.” (You can read the full statement here.)
With Walliams being a well-known children’s author – and his books now disappearing from some schools, libraries and homes – your child may well ask about him, or why they can no longer access his books.
They might’ve also seen clips of the news, or overheard other kids talking about the comedian.
How to respond to children who ask about David Walliams
Whatever your child asks about Walliams, Fiona Yassin, a family psychotherapist, and founder and clinical director of The Wave Clinic, advises responding calmly and gently.
“We can use direct, age-appropriate language to help them make sense of what they’ve heard,” she said.
“Responding calmly as a parent can help a child to make sense of potentially distressing information, soothe some of the feelings it brings up, and prevent those feelings from escalating further.”
If your child has seen something about the story on the news, the therapist suggested you can explain this in an age-appropriate way: “We might say, ‘We understand that journalists are reporting that some things happened to young women and teenagers – specifically, that he behaved in ways that were wrong. Journalists are also reporting that he has said these things didn’t happen. It’s important we always take seriously the things people say have happened to them. Now there has to be a period of time where other adults are able to learn and understand what has happened’.”
You can also ask your child if they have any questions they’d like to ask.
She suggested parents could say: “When we’re looking at things that have happened to other people, we need to be honest about what we know, and what we still don’t know. I wondered if there are any questions that you might like to ask me about what you’ve heard, which can help us to make sense of things.”
Lots of news stories of late mention big words like “allegations” which children might not really understand – and therefore might ask about.
To explain that in an age-appropriate way, the therapist suggested parents could say: “An allegation is something that somebody has said that hasn’t been completely established as being fact right now. People are continuing to look into what’s happened to work out the facts.”
What to say if your child has asked whether they can still like David Walliams’ books
In December of last year, it was reported that the publishing house HarperCollins UK – with whom Walliams had previously collaborated on more than 20 children’s books – had “decided not to publish any new titles” by the author.
More recently, HarperCollins confirmed it had dropped his backlist, meaning it would be phasing out his past titles, while Alton Towers confirmed last week that an area of the park inspired by his stories had been closed permanently.
If your child has noticed Walliams’ books have disappeared from shelves, they might ask if they’re still allowed to like them.
Yassin suggested you could say something like: “Yes, you can absolutely still remember how much the book made us laugh or how much we enjoyed reading it together. It’s also OK if you don’t feel the same way about the book today or if you feel differently about it now you’ve heard some new information that’s leaving you feeling differently.”
She suggested that some children might want to put the book down, some might want to throw it away, and others might want to finish the chapter they are on.
“Our role as parents is to support what feels right for your family in that book,” she said.
“Research suggests that calm parenting, and being able to be present in conversations with our children – however difficult the subject matter is – produces a better coping mechanism.”
She advises parents against throwing books away “in a volatile manner”.
“Sharing this information with your child is about supporting age-appropriate development, helping them understand that conversations can grow and evolve over time,” she concluded.
“Remember, when we make space for the little conversations, the bigger ones will flow. This is a learning point for everyone and a bridge to keeping tricky and difficult subjects open and accessible within the family.”
